Growing up in the “hood” we were a bit desensitized to violence, so when I got the text that said “___ has been shot” I'm not going to lie.. my initial reaction was “Who was fighting? Who is he beefing with now? Who was out there acting stupid?”
Unfortunately, people getting shot in my hood is not an uncommon occurrence. By the time I graduated from high school, I had crawled my way out of at least 4 shoot outs, ran from a few other situations before the guns came out and lost multiple associates to gun violence. Hell, I even stood beside a person as they initiated a shoot out… Do you know how it feels to know that someone beside you is shooting…meaning that all shots fired in retaliation are headed your way? I hope not.
When I heard that he had been shot I immediately thought “I wish him a speedy recovery”. And then I got the second text. He passed. Whoa. My stomach began to turn and my hurt began to ache. Trying to process what I had just been told. And then I thought of my friend. One of the best friends I have had, ever. His fiance and girlfriend of over 10 years. If I am this distraught, how does she feel? And then I thought of their kids… Wow. I can’t bear the thought of the kids. I can hear his son’s voice now.. his favorite words :”I’m going with my daddy. I want to go with my daddy”. He was such a daddy’s boy. And I cried. And cried. And cried. And couldn't sleep. And tossed. And turned. And cried.
And why oh why did I visit Facebook. The pictures, the condolences, the memories. And I cried a little more. He was a good man. Never seen him angry, starting trouble, or fueling drama. The pain caused by his senseless murder is a bit overwhelming.
Rest in Peace brother. We will keep your memory alive. I hope this will prompt our community to end the violence! Not willing to bury anymore of my brothers or sisters. I cant handle it. Its all too much.
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And then all I continue to hear is “we’re praying for you” and “God makes no mistakes” and “just let go and let God” and (if I may be completely honest) that bullshit is pissing me off.
I am not mad at the fact that you have faith in your God, I am upset about the fact that everyone is continuing to act as if these types of things are way beyond our control. As if we cannot change our destructive behaviors and mentalities towards one another. As if WE are not at all responsible for the state of our households and communities. As if we do not glorify the very violence that stole our brother’s life.
This is no time to keep saying “the good die young” and post this brother’s picture on a T-shirt and move on until the next death. No. This is a time to take action. Over 300 people “liked” one status on FB, expressing condolences for this brother’s family. That’s at least 300 individuals, households, families that can help prevent anything like this from happening again. We need to come together.. have the conversation.. hear one another’s concerns.. support one another. We need to make sure our kids are taken care of physically, emotionally and spiritually. That’s 300 individuals in one small town who are hurting and aware that things need to change. We've got to make something happen. If we continue to do what we've always done, we will continue o get what we've always gotten. And I’m not willing to accept that.
So sure.. pray to God. Ask for peace of mind, deliverance, guidance, relief..whatever you need.. but don't you dare neglect to take personal accountability for the way you affect your environment. Don’t you dare “let go and let God” to the point where you feel helpless to improve your situation. Because there is a lot that you can do.
Change your energy, change your life. We need to vow to love one another and tolerate our petty differences. We can BE the change that we want to see in our world. BE positive. BE loving. BE caring. BE supportive. GIVE BACK. There are things that you can do right here, right now to improve your situation.
DO THEM! Peace.
